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What Defines You?


Often when meeting someone for the first time, the introductions include the standard smile, handshake, exchange of names, then the inevitable question ‘what do you do for a living?’ There are numerous variations of this question. At a work function, you may be asked your division, function or title. The gentleman seated next to you on the plane might ask what line of work you’re in. You get the picture. The gist of the question is that we often identify WHO WE ARE by WHAT WE DO. While our professional occupation has some bearing on our identity, it should not serve as the primary basis for defining us in the world.

Someone I care about recently made the courageous decision to leave a job that was sucking the life out of her and leaving her feeling dejected and depleted day after day. While the uncertainty of not having another position lined up is causing an expected amount of stress, her primary source of anxiety stems from the fact that for the past 20 years, she has rooted her IDENTITY and VALUE in her career. She feels lost and less than whole without that job title / employer descriptor in which she placed so much stock. I've been there and might still be stuck in that mindset had my husband not lovingly exclaimed ‘Honey, you are losing yourself in your job!’ He was right. I had to pull back, strike a better balance and learn how to acknowledge all of the characteristics, roles and experiences that make me uniquely me! I am more than my occupation, family status, income bracket, education level…

Let me introduce myself. I am a SciFi buff, a conscientious caregiver, a secretly sensitive soul, Frank’s wife of 25 years, the fiercely independent daughter, mother to Ivana & Joshua, a disciple of Jesus, a thrifty (cheap) date, a degreed engineer, a borderline claustrophobic, a Strategic HR Business Partner, a music lover & amateur singer , a wartime Army veteran, #3 of four sisters, Melissa’s best friend since high school, a Life & Leadership Coach passionate about helping others unearth their potential!

Who are you?

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